Volume 3: Leap of Faith

     

         Stepping out in faith is scary, but it is necessary in our walk with Christ to lay our lives bare at times in absolute faith. It can be scary to step into the unknown, but what safer place is there except to be under the shadow of His wings. We need to abandon ourselves to Jesus, if we are always comfortable then what need have we of the Comforter. The Holy Spirit is in us to supply exactly what we need from God. We found ourselves there, a door opened to us but it meant leaving our home and family. It was scary.

    I walked with Hannah for a while and we prayed, I mustered up the courage to say yes after we talked for a while. I came up to Torben and Chris and said, "I guess we will do it." Chris said, "Thats not gonna work, you need to make a decision. Its time to be a man, either be all in or all out." I'm not gonna lie, I was a little taken back at the comment. If I'm honest, I was offended. I thought to myself, "who in the world does this guy think He is?" But truth is that it was exactly what I needed to hear. I told him yes, wholeheartedly we would do it. Looking back I am grateful for that exchange, Jesus demands our yes, not our maybe. What marriage is completed by saying, maybe I do, or what job is accepted with a maybe. I realize now that better are the wounds of a friend than the kisses of an enemy (Proverbs 27:6).

    My wife and I are polar opposites in our personalities. I grew up getting to do for the most part whatever I wanted, she grew up in church and was more regulated through that process. God has revealed that we are perfect for each other. Where I needed more self control, she provided; and where she needed more of a freedom of heart, I was able to help. It hasn't always been as easy as that, and the enemy seeing opportunity tried to take advantage of that. It was outrageously difficult to make it only two hours to the school from Greenville. We were arguing and being harsh with one another. The enemy in no way wanted us to make it there, he must have known that the Lord planned to set us free through this. We had people try to talk us out of going. We ourselves even wavered in our decision. Fear, anger and questions begin to take over. Hannah told me at one point she as going to just get out of the car because we were in such a harsh disagreement. We drove two hours there and almost didn't make it. I sent a text to Chris and asked him to pray for us. It was the heaviest time of my life, everything was trying to stop us, but we stayed the course.

    We got to the school in North Carolina. As soon as we got on the property everything broke off of us. The argument stopped and peace came over us. It was almost as if something fled from us as we got there. The enemy was throwing his darts as hard and as fast as he could to stop us. We were met by the most loving and genuine people. Even with my frail state I could sense that the Lord was in that place. I remember saying in my heart that these are my people, they are sold out for Jesus, all in. Not saying others don't genuinely love Jesus but there is a stark difference in giving Jesus some of your heart and life and giving Him all of it. 

    We entered into the school and community immediately, the classes were great and the teaching sound. What impacted me most was the fear of the Lord that was stewarded in that place. I found myself on my face off alone from everyone else repenting for things God pricked my heart about. No-one even prayed for me. It was Holy Spirit convicting and taking my desperate cry for freedom seriously. I found myself free, conscience was clear and confidence towards God restored. We must have a clean conscience towards God, Jesus gave His life and shed His Blood to cleanse our conscience. Most of the time we do what we want and go to church to balance the scales. We must be free, He paid the price for it. It is for freedoms sake that He has set us free, and who the Son sets free is free indeed!

    From the school we went down to a kickstart in Jacksonville, Florida. A kickstart is an event for equipping to minister the Gospel. How to lead people to repentance, baptize them in water and then baptize them into the Holy Spirit. Also how to cast out demons, heal the sick and disciple believers. I felt so inadequate there, still shaking off the effects of the lifestyle I turned from. Everything moved very quickly. All around me people were getting prayed for, a lot of people being delivered. On the floor flailing and screaming, others were throwing up but the fruit of it all was people being set free. It was beautiful.

    By the end of it we were baptizing 30 to 40 people in the ocean. The Gospel was preached to others standing by, some responded and received prayer and heard more. It was amazing, so much fruit for the Kingdom of God. I was so encouraged but also so overwhelmed with the thought that I was not equipped to do the same thing. God has different plans. When we lay it all down (and I mean everything) we become a pen in the Hand of the Master Author, He uses us for His Glory and for the worlds sake. He calls us to give our whole heart. "Anyone who puts His hand to the plow and looks back is not fit for the Kingdom of God." (Luke 9:62) God is calling you my friend to give up everything to follow Him, it is worth it. He has SO many good things prepared for you but will not force our hands. It has to be our choice, our life laid down to take up this great call of following Jesus. 

    We left from Jacksonville and headed back to the school in North Carolina. Our Luke 10 trip right around the corner. A trip with no money, no phone, no direction and no security. Giving Holy Spirit the right to direct and guide us for the sake of ministering the Gospel in power. I had no idea what would be in store.